Is Sex During Lent Sinful?
The Legitimacy of the Marital Act with Regards to Circumstances: Times - Part 1.
Right before Lent, both Megan and I noticed a little buzz in various Catholic Facebook groups about whether or not Catholics are allowed to have sex during Lent, on feast days, or fast days. It seems that most married couples understand that there are currently no formal Church disciplines concerning this matter, but some did seem sincerely confused as to the current practice.
Here is what Tanquerey had to say in 1922:
24. (D) Concerning times. (a) The conjugal act is not strictly prohibited on any feast days by the current discipline. Yet, it is wiser to abstain from requesting the debt on feast days, fasts, and the night proceeding Holy Communion. [The debt], however, is to be rendered upon legitimate request, especially if the other spouse may be afraid of the danger of [sexual] incontinence.¹
Of course, the words of Saint Paul still hold their full force: “Defraud not one another, except, perhaps, by consent, for a time, that you may give yourselves to prayer; and return together again, lest Satan tempt you for your incontinency.” (1 Cor 7:5 - DRB)
As always, the great confessor and spiritual director, Saint Francis de Sales, has a wise and gentle thing to say on this matter.
I must say here a word to the married. In the Old Law God disapproved that creditors should exact their debts upon festival days, but He never disapproved of debtors paying that which was owing if demanded on these days. This rule should be the guide of the married in regard to their mutual obligation. It is unbecoming to ask on the day of Communion that which however it would be meritorious to pay if demanded. No one, therefore, should be debarred from Holy Communion by compliance in this matter, if their devotion causes them to desire it. In the primitive Church Christians communicated every day although they were married and blessed with children. Whence I infer that frequent Communion is by no means inconsistent with the state of a parent, husband or wife, provided that the person who communicates be discreet and prudent. As to bodily maladies there are none which lawfully impede Communion, save such as cause frequent vomiting.²
So, to the best of my knowledge, there are currently no formal prohibitions against the marital act on certain days or liturgical seasons, at least for the Roman Rite. Most modern authors do not even bother mentioning the issue or they simply note that past disciplines have fallen into disuse. If anyone does know of any authors that have written to the contrary, please use our contact form to let me know.
Footnotes
Adolphe Tanquerey, “Supplementum ad Tr. de Matrimonio,” in Synopsis Theologiæ Moralis et Pastoralis, vol. 1, De Pænitentia, De Matrimonio et Ordine, 9th ed. (Rome: Desclée & Co., 1922), n. 24 [My translation].
Francis de Sales, Philothea or An Introduction to the Devout Life (Charlotte: TAN Books, 2010), Part Second: Counsels Concerning the Soul’s Approach to God in Prayer and the Sacraments, chapters 20, page 109. [N.B.: some versions of Philothea leave out this paragraph entirely, which is why I have quoted it entirely.]
