Can Catholics Manscape?
Response to James S.
“I have been researching the topic of Catholic intimacy and came across your website. I appreciate the thoughtful work you have contributed to this area.
I think perhaps the porn industry has influenced perceptions of Catholic intimacy, causing people to worry that most forms of sexual activity are immoral. As a result, there is now a tendency to swing to the opposite extreme, emphasizing minimal foreplay and a very restricted view of marital intimacy.
With this context in mind, I would like your opinion on a specific issue: the topic of pubic hair grooming. Some Catholic sources suggest that complete shaving can be considered inappropriate or sinful, often citing concerns about motives and potential deceitfulness (because you’re trying to make yourself look like a child). However, these sources typically do say anything about grooming based on the preferences to your spouse.
Could you please share your thoughts on this? Thanks a ton.”
Dear James,
Thank you so much for your question. Whether or not it is moral to groom downstairs is a new question for me. I would say that the principle of adornment to please one's spouse applies here:
“Nevertheless a woman may use means to please her husband, lest through despising her he fall into adultery. Hence it is written (1 Cor 7:34) that the woman that is married thinketh on the things of the world, how she may please her husband. Wherefore if a married woman adorn herself in order to please her husband she can do this without sin.” - SmTh II-II, Q. 169, a. 2, Resp.
As for the objection, if one says that shaving pubic hair is deceitful or attempting to look like a child, then one would have to say the same thing about a man's face. Yet, many religious orders have at one time or another required that their subjects be clean-shaven.
In Christo Rege,
James
Although the rates are lower than the general population, Catholics do get divorced. Far more live for years and even the rest of their lives in unhappy marriages. For many couples, including those who would say that their marriage is strong, sex is a point of division rather than unity. This can come from a variety of factors. There may be sexual trauma, sex may be painful, there may be a fear of getting pregnant, there may be emotional or physical abuse or neglect. For some couples, sex is a bargaining chip or a manipulation tool.