Can Catholics Manscape?
Response to James S.
“I have been researching the topic of Catholic intimacy and came across your website. I appreciate the thoughtful work you have contributed to this area.
I think perhaps the porn industry has influenced perceptions of Catholic intimacy, causing people to worry that most forms of sexual activity are immoral. As a result, there is now a tendency to swing to the opposite extreme, emphasizing minimal foreplay and a very restricted view of marital intimacy.
With this context in mind, I would like your opinion on a specific issue: the topic of pubic hair grooming. Some Catholic sources suggest that complete shaving can be considered inappropriate or sinful, often citing concerns about motives and potential deceitfulness (because you’re trying to make yourself look like a child). However, these sources typically do say anything about grooming based on the preferences to your spouse.
Could you please share your thoughts on this? Thanks a ton.”
Dear James,
Thank you so much for your question. Whether or not it is moral to groom downstairs is a new question for me. I would say that the principle of adornment to please one's spouse applies here:
“Nevertheless a woman may use means to please her husband, lest through despising her he fall into adultery. Hence it is written (1 Cor 7:34) that the woman that is married thinketh on the things of the world, how she may please her husband. Wherefore if a married woman adorn herself in order to please her husband she can do this without sin.” - SmTh II-II, Q. 169, a. 2, Resp.
As for the objection, if one says that shaving pubic hair is deceitful or attempting to look like a child, then one would have to say the same thing about a man's face. Yet, many religious orders have at one time or another required that their subjects be clean-shaven.
In Christo Rege,
James
Want More Content Like This?
Sign up to get our exclusive Marital Intimacy Assessment. Plus, if you sign up for SMS, we'll text you a code to download our Yes, No, Maybe sexual exploration guide for Catholics for FREE! We respect your privacy and will never sell your information.
Subscribe
In our modern world, couples are facing incredible challenges when it comes to building and maintaining strong, faith-filled marriages. As Catholic clergy—bishops, priests, and deacons—you are often the first point of contact for couples who are seeking guidance in their relationships. Your mission to help them cultivate healthy, holy marriages is crucial. Yet, let’s be honest—addressing certain sensitive topics, especially around intimacy and marital love, can sometimes be daunting or difficult to navigate. As a former seminarian, I understand the limited focus of clerical moral theology formation to be in preparation for the confessional, not to explain to couples how to address morally common issues such as vaginismus, low-libido, erectile dysfunction, or premature ejaculation.